Mondo Beyondo

It is that time of year again
Time to dream BIG
Let it all out
Put them onto paper
Give your dreams a chance to speak
No dream is to small, silly, or to big
All dreams need to be heard
Time to set them into motion
Send them out into the universe
Say them out loud

Pick up your pen
Open up your heart and mind
And begin writing
List out all of those wild dreams you have
**teaching, **traveling to Bora Bora, **riding my bicycle cross country
Reach high
Go for it
Dream BIG

It is amazing what can unfold when you put it out there
When you let the universe know exactly what is calling to your heart
Little things happen
Seeds are planted
And somehow your dreams come true
I was skeptic at first to
But believe me
Some of my wildest dreams on my mondo beyondo list have come true
And really, what do you have to lose?
So pick up that pen and get writing

If you aren't sure how to start
Check out the Mondo Beyondo online class
It is all about dreaming big
Andrea Scher and Jen Lemen will guide you through
Opening your heart and
Giving your dreams a voice
And each year you will want to write a new list
Great things happen when you put your dreams out their

Happy dreaming!

christmas 2011

Gathered together with family and loved ones
An entire weekend of celebration
Rides inside of a suitcase
Laughing
Surprises at the door
Cheering on the Giants
More laughing
Unwrapping gifts all at once
Special presents under the tree
A delicious breakfast feast
Unwrapping gifts one at a time
Cousins gathered together
Singing
Laughing even harder
Memories created
Smiles shining from faces
Laughter filling the air
A beautiful Christmas weekend

release

I was looking forward to releasing all that no longer served me from the minute I read about it on Pixie's blog.  What a perfect way to end the year and to let go off all that I have been carrying around.  I do not have a fire place or all the beautiful materials that Pixie created her bundles with.  But I had a piece of paper, a pen, a silver bowl, a lighter, a loving boyfriend who so willingly joined in, and an intention.

After many long working hours we sat outside beneath the awning on the deck as the rain trickled down.  The cold air waking me up each of us sat with our thoughts.  Quietly we let the pen pull the words from deep inside.  Dredging them up and giving them a voice.  We let it all spill out.

Tears filled my eyes as the pen pulled out these feelings...I am not good enough to be a teacher...The inner struggles of taking the next step in getting my writing out there....And letting go of the darkness I have been carrying on my shoulders.

It felt so freeing to let them each speak as I wrote them down.  He lit his piece of paper first, then mine.  It was beautiful watching them each burn.  The smoke rose into the air taking all of those words with it. The fears, the struggles, the darkness.  All of it drifted away from us.  He put his arm around me and pulled me in close.

Doing this with him was beautiful.  I am able to stand in my own shoes each day wearing the clothes that are truly mine, and he stands besides me, loving me.  I love that he took the time to write his own thoughts down and released them from deep inside.  Everything about that was beautiful.

I feel lighter now.  Ready to welcome 2012.  I also feel incredibly grateful for all the adventures I was on in 2011.  It was a beautiful L.O.V.E filled year and I  feel like the luckiest girl alive.  I stand here with my palms open welcoming the light.

This will definitely become a yearly tradition on each Winter Solstice.  Releasing, reflecting, and stepping into the light.  Thank you Pixie, for opening my world to this beautiful ceremony.  

your heART makes a difference

Feeling so blessed 

To have the opportunity to share my words

At your heART makes a difference

I would love it if you came by to visit me over there today

Happy Wednesday!

family love

The time fly's by so quickly
Christmas lurking right around the corner
In a few short days
I will be gathered with my family
Laughing, joking, soaking it all in
Happiness filling the air

I am so grateful for them
The time we spend together
How close we all are
The humorous things that arise
What a beautiful thing to be a part of

I stand here today with gratitude in my heart
For each of them
How unique they all are
The kindness that is in each of their hearts
The family bond that brings us together

What a blessing to be surrounded
By so much kindness and love
I am forever grateful to be a Belthoff

Wishing you and your family
Kindness, love, laughter, and smiles
As the holidays draw closer in
And you come together to celebrate

beauty surrounds her

She wanted to know how I got here
What path I took
How I knew what road to travel down
But the truth is you never know
You just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other
You do not know where you are going to end up
In fact there are moments when you think you will not even smile again
But you do
You always do
There is always a rainbow on the other side
A gentle hand lifting you up
Pointing you in the right direction
Individuals you never dreamed of are there
And they guide you
They help you to heal
And they open up your eyes to amazing beautiful sights
Things that were in front of you this whole time
When that dark cloud of gloom was following you around
But sunshine has peeked through and for the first time you can see
And you are in awe of the beauty and love that surrounds you
You realize how magical this place is
How much beauty is around every corner
And all you have to do is wipe the sleep out of your eyes to see it
Yours eyes are open now
So incredibly wide there is beauty around every corner
And you are grateful
So incredible grateful
For wearing your heart on your sleeve
Putting yourself out there
And continuing to step deeply into the umknown
Life is filled with so many unexpected surprises
And you are soaking in the glory or each of them

gratitude

This community provides so much support and love
Holding my hand as I gently take each step forward
Listening, reaching out, lifting me up

Great things happen when we come together
Holding up the mirror
Guiding each other to truly see

We are not meant to travel this journey alone
Each of us is interlocked together
We are stronger when we lean on one another

Thank you for your support
For helping me to see
And filling me up with so much love

I am truly blessed to have you in my life

the beginning of the aftermath

Dealing with the aftermath is never easy
Speaking aloud the fears I am navigating through
Scares me more than the fears themselves
Feeling isolated and alone
As love swirls around me
Trying so hard to engulf me in it's essence

the beauty of gathering

Sharing our stories is what it is all about.  Sharing deeply who we are, the struggles we face, the roads we travel.  Sharing our dreams, our heartache, our insecurities.  Sharing all of it.  This is what is truly magical.  It takes strength to show up exactly as we are.  Five pounds heavier than we wished, dust on the floorboards, fears of not having anything of value to add.  But we show up none the less with our hearts on our sleeve.  And we are seen for exactly who we are.  You with your wide expansive heart,  your wise business sense, your adventurous spirit, and your quiet wisdom.  Love, pure love swirling around as paint get whisked onto paper and things get glued down.  Hearts opening, truths revealing themselves, and supportive love holding everyone up.  Realizations unfolding that we are all the same and we all are fearful of something.  Each of us sees that we are our own harshest critiques.  But as we gather we hold up the mirror for one another.  Reflecting back the beauty that we see in each other.  This is magic of gathering.  Sharing stories, making art, laughing, crying, and showing up.

where i've been

I have been busy over here
Settling in
Navigating my path
Finding where it all falls together

The sun is shining deep in my heart
A smile goes from ear to ear
I have a little dance in my step
And a song in my head

It is a good place to be
Where are you these days?

What has been shifting in your world?

sacred spaces

It was the small spaces she had to carve out
The ones specifically meant for herself
A trip to the coffee shop
A stroll around the pond
A tiny alter deep inside her closet
It was these sacred spaces that she needed
To keep herself aligned
To continue moving forward
Merging together with another requires some thought
Care and attention to detail
The journey of each others hearts cannot be lost
They must be taken into deep consideration
She knew she had to create these spaces for herself
There are some things she cannot compromise on
And although he might not understand it
He respects this sacred ground
He is happy to see her smiling
Dancing around the room as if she were a child
This brings delight to both of them
As together they each soak in their own sacred space

forgiving the past

It was the past he was most determined to forget
Storing it under lock and key
Then throwing the key away
Hoping that it would stay hidden in the dark forever

She wondered what he was hiding from
Why he did not want to face it
She wondered what scars lay deep below the surface
Not given adequate attention to heal

She knew well the struggle it was to face the past
Accept the decisions that had been made
Choosing to forgive mistakes
Then step openly into the future

She knew the tug of war that went on inside of her
Before she opened up her own locked box
She was grateful she found the key
Amazed she had the courage

She knows it is his own battle to fight
But she just wants to see him happy
Free from inner demons
Smiling widely from deep inside