feelings

Ramapo Reservation

The writing is the easy part. My hand moves easily across the paper. I know how to shape my letters effortlessly. Writing, that is easy. The difficult part is the thoughts, feelings, and emotions that I try to put down on the paper. How do I do them justice?

How do I express in words the way my stomach is filled with this buzzing feeling when you look into my eyes? It is like a wave of happiness pouring over me inside. Is there a word that can be used to help you understand this and feel it the way I do?

How do I put onto paper the safe feeling I felt standing in your kitchen engaged in conversation? Thoughts and feelings moving back and forth effortlessly between us. Such a simple thing, yet evoking so much within me.

How do I even begin to explain the sensation that grabbed a hold of my entire body when our lips pressed up against each other standing in your doorway? The softness that began with that simple little touch and spread out to ever limb in my body. How do I put into words that I did not want that moment to end?

How do you write out the incredible feeling of truly being seen for who you are? The feeling of being appreciated and valued? How do you explain how that makes you feel?

You see, writing is the easy part. Pouring out my feelings and emotions and having you understand them the way I feel them, that is the tough part. How do I do that?