Friday, May 05, 2006
Noise
Negative thoughts run through our heads on a daily basis. They play over and over like a broken record. Never stopping. Never ceasing. Always reminding us how we are not good enough.
Rarely do the positive words play over and over in our head. For some reason we tend to forget them.
*You are a liar
*You are a bitch
*I do not want to talk to you for a long time
*You are a slut
*You are stupid
*I do not love you
*I hate you
*You are a player of the heart
*You are my problem
Today these thoughts are running through my head. Along with the noise from outside which I have been hearing since seven this morning. I want to scream. I want to cry. I feel like I cannot achieve peace inside my head. Like someone left the television on static and I cannot shut it off. How badly I want to shut it off but the volume just keeps getting louder. How badly I want to feel calm, centered, and loved.
I need to be able to listen to the sound of my own voice. To trust it. Embrace it. Love it.
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